Wednesday, July 29, 2015

Musings of a Lonely Writer! ----- My Characters Love Lives are Better than Mine

So this time in my Musings of a Lonely Writer segment I will be writing about my characters having way better love lives than I, I know I am probably going to regret admitting this, lol!

Okay so I write primarily Young Adult Novels and what is a Young Adult Novel without even just a hint of romance, even just a teeny tiny love sub-plot works. Romances are sub-plots in all my novels as the adventure, the goal of the characters or the dangerous intrigue are the main-plots.

So when I write about my characters often times a romantic element will pop up for said character, which some of those scenes are fun to write but often leave me mortified as I want no one I know to read them, lol, but I will leave this to my next Musings of a Lonely Writer segment entitled, Musings of a Lonely Writer! ----- Minimalist Intimate Scenes Between Characters Mortify Me.

Any how so some of my favorite characters have had some amazing romances, I mean the kind to make you swoon, even if a bit unrealistic, cause who wants a totally realistic relationship in fiction all the time. I love a far too perfect relationship than the ones that make it so real I hate the characters for it, lol, as you can see I am not only complicated but picky about what I like in a novel relationship.

Now we get to the real nitty-gritty center of things. So I have had some amazing characters fall in love and though I do throw in some troubles I tend to keep them perfectly in love and so maybe that has made me dysfunctional in my thoughts of real relationships and love.

As part of my religion we don’t date until we are ready for marriage. I always thought I would marry young and have kids young. As time went by I didn’t find a man I wanted to date, I’ve been asked out but I was young and wasn’t looking for anything serious and the guys were not of my religion so I said no. So I will admit I have never been on a date and I am 27 years old.

Now my thoughts and views have changed on real relationships and I am not sure I want one but at times I do, so way complicated I know, lol. I know if I get in a relationship the guy will be nothing like my male heroes in my novels and it sort of freaks me out. I mean I know guys in real life are real, not fictional so I know they will have faults, foibles, issues of all kinds but I mean who wouldn’t want to have a guy be like the kind of guy in a novel!

My characters seem to not only be more out going they are better in the way they live, love, raise families, ect. It’s a bit infuriating but then again I do write about them so maybe I give them everything I don’t have. In some ways I don’t want what they have but in other ways I kind of do. I feel right now that I can’t handle dating a guy that is liable to be so real I can’t stand it, lol.

Plus no guy I know even makes me want to think of dating them and I gather they feel the same about me because it’s been ages since I was last asked out. I started to even question if something was wrong with my looks, personality ect. But who needs those worries in their life so I quickly put it out of my head, well maybe not completely, lol!

***

So anyway I thought I would share a bit about my Favorite Couple-

Princess Jadzia Elizabeth Van ton and Jedrek. These two are two of my youngest couples and they are in, “The Green Haven Series”. They I call my Romeo and Juliet couple without all the dying.

Though I have had many wonderful couples in my novels Jadzia and Jedrek take the top spot because of the time and way their relationship blooms. It is a tumultuous time where the kingdom they reside in is on the brink or war. Jadzia is a Princess of a race that Jedrek’s race hates with a passion.

So when Jadzia and Jedrek’s races try to band together it is a very tricky and dangerous thing. Jadzia is young and helps Jedrek who feels older than his young age to finally be able to be young and enjoy his youth. It starts as a friendship and then progresses to more.

Jadzia and Jedrek made me laugh and cry and feel as if I were really along with them on the dangerous trip as Star Crossed Lovers who get a better ending than the couple they copy, Romeo and Juliet. Jadzia and Jedrek get a seemingly content happily ever after.

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I used to be a hopeless romantic *see definition below* but I’ve seen so many friends and family members relationships end so badly it makes me realize how real and hurtful it can be. Maybe that has damaged me or my view of relationships and love. They tell me don’t let what happened to them stop me but in a way it does because I don’t trust easily and I would hate to put trust where it doesn’t belong or with someone who shatters my trust in them. So maybe that is why my characters relationships are so good even when they lean a bit toward realistic, because I don’t want my characters to suffer bad romances.

Maybe I am just so confused about what I want and don’t want for myself but know fully what I want and don’t want for my characters because with them its not real so no damage done but in real life damage can be done.

** Here is the best definition of a Hopeless Romantic: This person is in love with love. They believe in fairy tales and love. They're not to be confused as stalkers or creepy because that's not what a hopeless romantic is. All hopeless romantics are idealists, the sentimental dreamers, the imaginative and the fanciful when you get to know them. They often live with rose colored glasses on. They make love look like an art form with all the romantic things they do for their special someone.

My View Years Ago about being a Hopeless Romantic is: I liked to believe and hear love stories, I loved to see people in love. I believed in fairy tales and hoped some day to have a love story of my own to tell. I hoped, I dreamed and I thought being a writer and avid reader led to me being more of a Hopeless Romantic.

My Views now: I still tend to believe in fairy tales and true love as I know these kinds of relationships are a gift from Jehovah God and should be viewed as a gift. I have just never really seen or experienced the kind of love that would make me view myself any longer as a Hopeless Romantic.

I don’t have rose colored glasses on, I view things the way they are and sometimes that takes a toll on my stories. When I was younger the sweet sentimental love played out in my novels and now my stories tend to go darker in all aspects and the love is portrayed differently now. I often times wish I could see the world and relationships as I did when I was 17 verses 27, and that I could bring that to my stories again. **


Maybe these quotes which I love can have more meaning for me and others.

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. -- Oscar Wilde *Maybe for now being okay and loving myself and what I have should be where I start before I look for another to love me and for me to love them.*

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you've imagined. - Henry David Thoreau *Maybe I don’t want romance yet because there are still things or dreams  I want to accomplish on my own before I start a journey with another person. Things change and so maybe what I always imagined having changed when I didn’t realize it. Maybe what the future holds will be better then what I imagined at first.*

So maybe for now I am slightly alright flying solo until I find some who makes me see reality is better than fiction. A guy who makes me see how great real can be and who could make my male heroes feel like they can’t hold a candle to him, lol! Someone to start a journey with that will far outshine any journey my characters have taken.

Or maybe I find out a solo journey through life is all I will get and I should make the best of it. Maybe exploring the world alone and embracing singleness is what I am to do. I will just have to see where this life leads me. Being 27 years old is not the end. I have many wonderful years ahead of me, and hopefully many wonderful stories, characters, and characters journeys.

This has been Musings of a Lonely Writer and until next time if you feel as I do about feeling your characters have better love lives than you drop me a comment in the comment section of this post, or if you simply have anything to say leave a comment and I would be glad to read it. Remember to Keep Reading, Keep Writing, Keep Inspiring, and above all Love Yourself no matter your relationship status, love yourself the way you are now and don’t feel bad if your characters have way better love lives, or at least come to accept it as I have, lol!

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